My reaction

When my son was diagnosed with autism I was happy.

I was not devastated, hurt, angry, mad, or discouraged. I was relieved, happy, hopeful, and it was an all-around good thing.

After the diagnosis I updated my status on Facebook, and the first 4 responses from friends were of condolences. I was kind of taken back, most everyone I knew looked at it as a bad thing. I guess it has to do with perspective, and apparently my perspective was much more positive than others.

You see, the way I look at it must have been different than everyone else. I saw the diagnosis as clarity, focus, an explanation, and basically relief.

I never look at my son as having a disability. Sure, the state see him as having a disability, and maybe the school and all his different therapists also look at my son as having a disability, but I just look at him as being....him. If my son woke up tomorrow and no longer had autism, I wouldn't know who he was, and I don't think he would know what to do with himself.

I do worry about how his life will turn out, and what will happen to him after my wife and I are gone. I am almost sure he will always live at home, and that's fine with me, he may not, you never know, we just have to see how it goes. I can only hope his brother will be there for him, but I don't worry about his daily life. Why should I, he doesn't, he just goes about his day.

Yeah I get frustrated and discouraged many days, and some days I get angry, like when he keeps attacking the little guy, but I will always love my son, and never think he's disabled.

Did I mention he bit me on the face today? Yeah, he gets angry and sometimes his only outlet is to bite me. I did not hit him, smack him, or yell at him, all I could do was keep holding him close to me and walk to the car. He was mad, but I love him, he's my son.