Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Autism is always 100%

Having a child with autism is hard sometimes. It's straining emotionally and mentally, it taxes you physically, it takes a toll on the family, as well as people who come in contact with us on a daily basis. When Logan does something it's always 100%. It doesn't matter if its sleeping, playing, eating, watching a movie or playing with his iPad.... It's always 100%. 

Logan watches movies differently than anyone I know. With everyone else it's a passive experience, you sit and watch, take in the story, become emotionally involved with the characters but that's about it. Logan watches a movie very differently. He will act out the parts, try to say the lines, emotionally act out scary or heartfelt scenes. Chase scenes in any movie is full action, he will run around the house, jumping, flying, rolling and sliding... It's always a blast. With emotionally charged dialogue scenes he will try to say the lines, but he will also have the same postures as the actors, even making the same movements and facial expressions. Fight scenes are the worst, because he will try to fight it out with someone or something and most times it's the person closest to him, mom, me, his brother, the dog....anyone. Watching a movie to Logan is anything but passive, it's all about total immersion. 

When it's time to eat, it's time to eat and he will get something to eat if you don't have something made for him. It's rare for him to eat with us mostly because he's already had his dinner, or he's still eating what he decided was his dinner. We're lucky in that many times he wants yogurt, or bananas for dinner, but sometimes he wants corn dogs or pizza. I can't complain to much because at least he wants healthy stuff more often than not. 

Going to the park is all or nothing. We have a pretty sizable park close to us that's pretty kid friendly and it's pretty large. Because he will wander, going to the park for us is not sitting on a bench and watching him play like other parents , it's constantly go go go. I'm usually about three steps behind him at any given moment. Climbing up and down, around in circles, helping him climb up a rope ladder or going to the swings, going across the bridge or sliding down slides, yup at my age I still have to go down slides. I have to go down the slides right behind him, it takes to long to go around and I might loose him. At the same time I am steering him away from things we don't want him near, like the road, the skate park area, or the closed down community pool. There is a caboose on train rails in the park and its pretty old and worn out. The city has finally locked it up so children can't go inside anymore. That's great for me as any parent of an autistic child will tell you they are fascinated with trains and everything to do with them. I never knew what we would find inside the caboose. Before the city boarded it up most of my time spent with him at the park was spent trying to steer him away from the caboose, or trying make sure he didn't hurt himself inside. Now he knows I don't have the power to open it and let him play in it anymore so the park is much more fun for me, and it doesn't seem to bother him as much. 

When it's time for bed.... That's a bit of trouble sometimes. There are nights he will go into his room and watch tv or play with his iPad for a while, then he poops out crashes, usually with the tv or iPad on. Then there are nights he just will not stop. He will come out of his room five times, ask for something to eat or drink or want a different movie put in. He has come out on a few occasions and said a whole paragraph of things to us that make no sense because it's in his form of words, then he turns around and goes right back in his room. Let me tell you, he has told some funny stories... At least...they're funny to us. Some nights nothing will get him to sleep, I have had to stay up until 12 or 1 in the morning because he's still up. It's not like he's drank a six pack of soda, or had five cups of coffee, he's just not tired. Eventually I will have to go in and lay him in his bed, tell him it's time to sleep, and wait till he's dropping off to leave. Sometimes that's just how it has to be. The strangest thing is there have been a number of days when we have noticed he isn't running around reeking havoc acting out a movie or raiding the fridge for yogurt, and we go into his room and find him out cold, upside down and backwards in his bed.... Those days are cute. 

My son may be different, but he is never boring. He is always going, always doing, always at the maximum of anything he knows he can do. He's always 100% into anything. I wonder if we were more like that what life would be like. 

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